S1 EP5: How to Overcome the Fear of Starting Your Own Business and Actually Get Started

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Today’s guest is High Performance and Mindset Coach Carrie Veatch.

Carrie helps ambitious entrepreneurs bust through their self-doubt so they can create wildly profitable online businesses. She has a Master’s degree in counseling psychology, which led to her working as a therapist before starting her coaching practice at Set Yourself Free.

Carrie now runs two online businesses, including her coaching practice, both built around her core value of freedom – including time freedom, financial freedom, and location freedom. Because of the way she’s built her businesses, she’s able to enjoy the digital nomad lifestyle she loves. She spent the last 4 years traveling around Asia and I believe is now in Mexico.

In this conversation, Carrie talks all about the mental blocks that hold so many would-be entrepreneurs back and how to bust through them so you can create the freedom-based business of your dreams.

Don’t forget to stick around to the end of the episode to hear my key takeaways, thoughts, and action items you can take away from this conversation.

Links and resources:


Key Takeaways

Thanks to Carrie for providing so much value and insight on this episode. Here are some of my favorite key takeaways from our conversation and some action items that you can start implementing today.

Key takeaway #1: Find your zone of genius.

Your zone of genius is the thing that you’re really great at. It’s the thing that friends and family always compliment you on or ask for your help with. And it’s also the thing that lights you up or that gets you into the state of flow where you lose track of time and hours feel like minutes.

Your business offering sits at the intersection of your zone of genius and what people will pay you for.

Gay Hendricks talks about the Zone of Genius in his book, The Big Leap, which is linked above. The book refers to four work zones: incompetence, competence, excellence, and genius. You can ask yourself these four questions from the book to start brainstorming what falls into your zone of genius:

  1. What do I most love to do? What do I enjoy working on so much that I can do it for long periods of time without getting bored or tired?
  2. What work do I do that doesn’t seem like work?
  3. In my work, what produces the highest ratio of abundance and satisfaction to the amount of time spent?
  4. What is my unique ability? What can I do that others are unlikely to be able to do at the same level?

Once you figure out what’s in your zone of genius, you can start to brainstorm ways to incorporate it into your business. Working in your zone of genius makes your business more fun and more sustainable over the long term.

Key takeaway #2: If you don’t have imposter syndrome, you’re probably not playing big enough.

Imposter syndrome is defined as a psychological pattern in which we doubt our skills, talents, or accomplishments despite external evidence of our competence.

I found one study that estimates that more than 80% of adults experience imposter syndrome at some point in their lives. Maya Angelou, Paul McCartney, Michelle Obama, and so many other accomplished people have also spoken out about their own feelings of imposter syndrome.

So if you’re experiencing doubts about your skills and capabilities, you’re not alone.

Carrie mentioned in our conversation that if your imposter syndrome is just there, existing, but not driving the car and preventing you from taking action, then it’s not a real problem. It’s normal.

But if your imposter syndrome is driving the car and holding you back, that’s when you need to address it.

Dr. Valerie Young, the leading expert on imposter syndrome, says that if you want to stop feeling like an imposter, you have to stop thinking like an imposter.

One thing Carrie suggests to help with this is to look for evidence in your favor. Evidence that contradicts the idea that you’re an imposter. What training or certifications do you have in your field? What informal training or experience do you have? Have you gotten results for yourself or someone else in the past?

Finding evidence of your skills and abilities helps reframe your successes in a more positive light.

Key takeaway #3: Go all in for at least 90 days.

When Carrie first said this, I interpreted it as a deadline where if you committed for 90 days and it wasn’t working out – whether that’s your business or a new service or product offering – then you could quit and try something else.

But Carrie said not to think of it as a deadline, but as a full-out, hard commitment for a minimum of 90 days. And in these 90 days, you’re going all out, full-steam ahead with your marketing, selling, networking, and everything you can do to bring in sales.

If you fully commit for 90 days and it’s not working, then you can adjust or change directions as needed. But during that 90-day period, you have to give it everything you’ve got.

Key takeaway #4: Learn how to observe and change your thoughts.

In order to overcome your fear of getting started, you have to know where that fear is coming from. The way I learned to observe what was going on in my brain was through journaling. But Carrie mentioned something I’d never thought of before, which is that if you’re an auditory person, you can do an audio or video journal instead.

Either way you choose, the first step to overcoming the fear of putting yourself out there and of starting your business is to know what thoughts are holding you back.

Then you can choose new thoughts to work toward believing. For example, one of my current believes is: “If my friends and family see my TikTok videos, they’re going to think they’re cringey or dumb and I’ll feel embarrassed.”

What I would like to believe instead is, “If my friends and family see my TikTok videos, they’ll think they’re great and spread the word about my business because they’re rooting for my success.”

Or something along those lines.

But as Carrie mentioned, it might be a big leap to go from where you are now to where you want to be. So what you can do instead is use bridge thoughts. That’s one or more thoughts that bridge the gap between your current and goal thought.

For me, a bridge thought might be: “If my friends and family see my TikTok videos, they won’t care. They’ll ignore them and move on.”

You can practice believing these new thoughts by, again, looking for evidence. With enough practice observing your thought patterns and implementing new ones, you can shift your entire mindset.

Key takeaway #5: Take the path of least resistance.

As Carrie says, you don’t have to do the thing that feels massively scary and uncomfortable right now. Start with what feels easier.

One example I’ll share from my own life is something that Carrie and I touched on in the show. Creating content on Instagram and TikTok has historically been terrifying for me. And after lots of journaling, I realized the biggest fear I had around it was that people I know – my cousins and extended family, people I went to high school or college with, or the barista at my favorite coffee shop – would see me and think I’m stupid.

So now any time someone that I know likes one of my videos, or follows me, or pops up on my “friends on TikTok” list, I immediately block them.

I’m not proud of this one, you guys! If you know me in real life and I’ve blocked you on social media, I’m sorry. Eventually, my goal is to get to the place where I don’t feel embarrassed about being seen on social media and I embody the thought that Carrie mentioned on the show that people are rooting for and want to see my success.

But for now, I’m meeting myself where I’m at, and I’m taking the path of least resistance, or at least my interpretation of the path of least resistance.

And you can, too.

Episode Transcript (click to expand)

Note: This transcript was automatically generated and may include typos.

Introduction

[00:00:17] Megan: Hey there. Welcome back to the dollar sprout podcast. Thanks so much for being here. Today’s guest is high-performance and mindset. Coach Carrie Veatch. Carrie helps ambitious entrepreneurs bust through their self doubt so that they can create wildly profitable online businesses. She has a master’s degree in counseling psychology, which led to her working as a therapist.

[00:00:40] Before starting her coaching practice at set yourself free. Carrie now runs two online businesses, including her coaching practice, both built around her core value of freedom, which is also one of my core values. And for her, that means time, freedom, financial freedom, and location for you. Because of the way she’s built her businesses.

[00:01:03] She is able to enjoy the digital nomad lifestyle that she loves. She spent the last four years traveling around Asia and I believe is now in Mexico. In this conversation, Carrie talks all about the mental blocks that hold so many would be entrepreneurs back and how to bust through them so that you can create the freedom based business of your dreams.

[00:01:26] Please welcome Carrie Veatch, everybody.

[00:01:28]

Interview with Carrie Veatch

[00:01:30] Megan: Hey, Carrie, welcome to the dollar spot podcast. Glad to have you here.

[00:01:34] Carrie: Thank you so much, Megan, I’m excited to be here.

[00:01:37] Megan: Yeah. So jumping into the first question that I have. We hear so many would be online business owners who say things like, you know, I’ve, I’ve been thinking about starting a business for years, or I’ve Really.

[00:01:53] been wanting to do this, and they’ve just never taken action on that plan.

[00:01:59] And I think there are really two common scenarios and comments that I see. So I want to talk about them one at a time with you. And the first is that. People say, I don’t know what business to start. Right. And I get that one a lot. I struggle with that myself or struggle with in my current business with financial coaching, like, am I even in the right business?

[00:02:23] Do I want to do something different? So with all the options that are online these days, I think that it really there’s so much information that this tends to keep people stuck and hold them back from just getting started. So my question to you is how do you address this thought of, like, I just don’t know where to start and how do you figure out what type of business is a good fit for you?

[00:02:51] Carrie: Yeah. So there’s so many different ways to go about this. And the truth is, is like, it can be really overwhelming and we can stay in that overwhelm and then never take steps towards what we want. Right. Because our brain’s job is to keep us safe, to protect us. And so we’re going to always want to stay with what feels comfortable.

[00:03:11] Because that’s, what’s familiar. But some just like really practical ways, especially if you haven’t decided yet what your business is going to be, but you have this dream of having more financial freedom or location, freedom or time for you. All of the above, um, is really to take note, like, what are you great at?

[00:03:31] Like, this is so much of the zone of genius, right? That I think most of us live outside of if we’re not intentional around it. And so start to take stock, like, what are your friends and family come to you about? What do they ask your advice on? What, what lights you up like, because business is simply the intersection of like what you want to do and then what you can offer.

[00:03:52] And with that, I think it’s also really important to have a conversation around, like it’s not going to be perfect all the time. You’re not going to love it a hundred percent of the time, even though it’s your business, it’s your baby, whatever. Like, I just want you to feel like 80% of the time. I love my life.

[00:04:11] I love doing this. And to remember that there’s like, no, Perfection, when it comes to this, we just want to create something that you’re excited about doing most of the time and what you can sell, because I don’t want people to be want to burners or whatever you want to call that. Like, I actually want you to get paid and to get to do the work that you love.

[00:04:37] Megan: Yeah. Something that really held me back in the beginning was like this, this imposter syndrome, you know, a feeling like, well, I am really, I think I’m really good at this thing, but I don’t have qualifications or I don’t have any certification in this. Like I have a financial coaching business, which I mentioned, and I started.

[00:04:59] Financing college. Like my decree is literally finance with a focus in personal financial planning. But, when I decided that I wanted to do financial coaching, I was like, you know, had the same experience that I think a lot of people have of like, oh, well I should get a coaching certification first or, I have this degree, but I’m not a certified financial planner or something .

[00:05:23] So, do you work with people or have you worked with a lot of clients who kind of have had the same almost like never ending experience of, imposter syndrome of like, oh, well, I’m just going to keep getting this certification and do this. How do we get over that?

[00:05:39] I still don’t think I’m entirely over it. I feel imposter syndrome all the time.

[00:05:45] Carrie: So, first of all, I think it’s important to normalize this. You know, I think there are certain people that say if, and everyone can have their opinion on this and that’s fine, but. If you don’t have imposter syndrome, you’re probably not playing big enough. And I like that reframe, right? Because that’s the truth.

[00:06:05] There’s always going to be somebody that’s faster, better doing more than you are. And there’s someone that’s behind you that you can bring along with you. Like we need both, right. We need mentors. And people to show us what’s possible. And then we also need people that like we can help. So I just, first of all, like to normalize all this stuff, right.

[00:06:27] I taught a master class this morning and then we did some live Q and a, and I was just like, hi. There are no secrets. You know, if you’ve been around my space for long enough, you know, that I talk continually that the secret to success is knowing your own patterns. Like we all have doubts, we all have fears, but it’s like knowing what your patterns are and then how to work through them.

[00:06:51] So is imposter syndrome so loud that you can’t take any action? Okay. Then we probably do have to look at it because it’s causing you to freeze. But if it’s just kind of there and it’s in the passenger seat and it’s not driving the car, then like, can we just let it be okay.

[00:07:12] Megan: It’s not a problem if it’s not driving the car.

[00:07:16] Carrie: Yeah,

[00:07:17] Megan: that analogy.

[00:07:18] Carrie: I just, that to me is so helpful. You know, I have a lot of clients or people that come to my trainings and are like, Ooh, I wish I could be like you and have no fears. And I’m like, don’t be deceived. I have loads of them. They just sit in the passenger side, like they don’t drive the car. And I think that’s, what’s so important, right.

[00:07:38] Because if I waited until I felt a hundred percent ready to do anything, I would never get off my couch. Like literally never.

[00:07:49] Megan: Yeah. same. That’s very true. I want to talk about, So I know you said looking at things that you’re good at and things that you enjoy and kind of the cross section there. There’ve been so many things that I feel like I am good at.

[00:08:06] But I don’t enjoy that. I feel like, oh, but I could make a business out of this because I am good at it. Like I’ve developed that skill. And there are so many things that I enjoy and I feel like I’m not really great at, how do we find the sweet spot between, you know, the level of enjoyment that we get from something and the level of, skill or expertise that we have, and where those two intersect to form something that could be a sustainable business that we enjoy doing that we can also make money from.

[00:08:40] Carrie: Yeah. So honestly, to me, this is like so complicated and specific to what your goals are in life. Right?

[00:08:48] And so much of this is knowing yourself.

[00:08:51] Um, and I think it’s just figuring out, like, what are your priorities? Do you want to do something that like 70% of the time you enjoy. And you’re like happy for, and you show up for, but like you’re okay. Going 30% of the time. All right. This kind of sucks. I don’t like this, but I get paid really well. And 70% of the time I’m really enjoying what I’m doing.

[00:09:13] And so I just think again, it’s like giving yourself permission and this is so much of what I joke my job is as a coach, like I give people permission, like, oh, you want to do it that way? I’m like, cool. Let’s do it that way. You know, and it’s that sweet spot, of course, of like knowing the market and who you’re speaking to and making sure you can actually sell, said offer that you have in your business, but there’s no like magic formula of, you know, oh, if I only ran my business, like Sally did, then I’d feel happier.

[00:09:47] Well, probably not because Sally’s business model probably doesn’t fit your lifestyle.

[00:09:52] Megan: Have you ever worked with anybody or experiences in your own business where like you’re in it and then.

[00:10:00] You decided to kind of do a 180 and do something completely different. And the reason I’m asking kind of is, because I’m experiencing this right now, personally, where like, I, you know, for years have pursued financial coaching. And then in 2022, I’m making a big pivot in my business.

[00:10:21] So I’m just curious, you know, experiences that you’ve had working with clients on, when to know you have the right idea to start a business, or like how to know that you need to make a big shift in your business.

[00:10:37] Carrie: I mean, I’ve definitely been through this and then helped loads of clients through this in bigger or more subtle ways. Honestly, I think the evaluation piece to me is first of all, Are you happy again? Not a hundred percent of the time, but if you are resenting your business, if you’re resenting your clients, like that is a huge red flag.

[00:10:58] Let’s look at that . Again, it’s fine. If you have bad moments, bad days, all of that, that’s normal. But if the majority of the time, like you are resentful, the knots, a big red flag to look at. I also think if you have been consistent now, this is where it’s like hard sometimes for the said person to judge this because we’re so attached to our stories and we’re so in our narrative sometimes. But if you have really gone all the way in for 90 days and you are marketing, you’re selling, you’re networking, you’re doing the things in your business to pull in more sales and it’s not converting and not working.

[00:11:40] And you’re like, so dang frustrated, but I really say 90 days because you have to go all in for at least 90 days, in my opinion, especially when it comes online, like people need to like know and trust you and go through a whole cycle with you. And if you’ve done that and you’re making zero sales or you’re making sales and you’re still like, man, that’s a place to look at too.

[00:12:06] Megan: I love that idea of, you know, setting a commitment, like a deadline for yourself. I feel like that almost gives you permission to say it does give you permission to say like, okay, at the end of this, if it’s not working or if I’m not enjoying. Then I’m going to quit because, you know, I think I’ve had that experience before where like for a while I felt like I stuck with financial coaching and this business for so long that I couldn’t quit because I had too much invested in it, you know?

[00:12:34] But setting that deadline of like, after 90 days, if something’s not working, I can make a big change or I can just go in a different direction. I really like that.

[00:12:45] Carrie: Yeah. And the thing is, is like, You can do that in less than 90 days. Like, do whatever feels best for you? I just hate watching people quit on themselves too soon. Or let’s say you give yourself a 90 day, um, like deadline, cause I’m honestly not a big fan of deadlines, actually. Especially when it comes to like manifesting or getting what you want.

[00:13:04] Cause think. Usually like counting your counterintuitive, we think it’s going to work, but it puts more pressure. But like, I want you to go all in for 90 days and show up and work it, not like, oh, I’m going to show up once a week. Woe is me. This is terrible. It’s not working. Like all of that is not going to work.

[00:13:22] So. You know, like we have to get really, really honest with ourselves. Um, and I find that that’s the difference makers who right. When we can take radical responsibility for our life, our happiness, our business, then it’s like, oh, okay. Everything changing.

[00:13:42] Megan: Yeah. So it’s not a deadline of 90 days. It’s a come as hard commitment of 90 days,

[00:13:49] Carrie: I see it that way, because otherwise you’re just gonna, like, it’s going to be spinning your wheels and then you’re going to be self-sabotaging most likely, right? Because, maybe you go, well, I’m going to do this for 90 days and prove to myself that it doesn’t work. And it’s like, well, then that’s not gonna work either.

[00:14:06] Megan: Yeah, That brings me to the second part of what I mentioned earlier of like the two things that tend to hold people back, which is. Like, let’s say you commit to 90 days, but you start and you get really caught up in the weeds and all the behind the scenes stuff and, you know, setting things up, then making sure everything is perfect, but then you’re not actually, you know, putting yourself out there.

[00:14:32] You’re not selling things. You’re not doing the things that you need to do to make money. So a couple of questions for you around this. Why does so many people. To this, like what, what causes us to get into this cycle and to stay in this cycle of like taking action, but taking it in the wrong direction?

[00:14:57] Carrie: First of all, like have grace with yourself. Again, being an entrepreneur is very different than being an employee. No, one’s telling you what to do. No, one’s checking up on you. There’s no like markers. When you hit these goals, then you get a raise. You know, it looks very different.

[00:15:12] So we have to have so much grace with ourselves in this process. And then the like big, overarching answer, I would say, and then we can break it down, but it’s like, it’s conditioning. We are thought we, we, we learn to think a certain way to be a certain way based on the school system, our society, like everything, trains us to think and be a certain way.

[00:15:35] So we have to unlearn that. Which is the difficult work of entrepreneurship. I think what we see sometimes is we see people who are a hundred steps ahead of us, and then we make ourselves so wrong.

[00:15:47] We’re like, oh my gosh, I can’t do it. Like her, what is wrong with me? I should be further along and blah, blah, blah. Right. The tapes play over and over and over again. So.

[00:15:56] This is why I teach my clients and work with my clients so much around mindset. And it starts with observing your thoughts. Like, we are not taught how to do this.

[00:16:09] And so it’s having grace and permission and being like, okay, so I’m going to witness my thoughts, just going to observe. And not judge them and not make them wrong. I’m scared. I’m afraid. If I put myself out there, aunt, Susan’s going to make fun of me. That guy from high school is going to laugh at me.

[00:16:31] Like whatever thoughts come up. Notice. Like you’re a human. Okay, cool. Yes. You have a deep need and desire to belong. We all do . So it starting with just really observing, like, what are my thoughts? And can you start to observe what those are that are holding you back and whatever. Like really talk about is the connection between our thoughts and our feelings.

[00:16:55] Right? Cause all of a sudden we’re feeling really crappy and we’re like, wait a minute. How did I get here? And so we have to learn to connect those of like, what am I feeling? Ooh, what thoughts was I thinking? And whichever direction works for you. Like some people are more thought oriented. Some people are more feelings oriented, but there’s a direct correlation.

[00:17:16] Which I personally did not know for the longest time or didn’t believe, you know, like I’m trained as a therapist. We were all like feelings, but I feel like I missed the whole section on thoughts and how much that played into it. So, you know, and I could go on and on about this, but basically like really starting there and just observing and seeing like, huh, okay, what’s going on, check in with myself.

[00:17:42] And then we start doing the work to reprogram our mind. Into having more empowering thoughts and feelings toward the goals that we want.

[00:17:52] And I would literally journal, like, just write them out. Don’t feel to yourself, just get them all out on a piece of paper or like I have some clients that are more auditory and.

[00:18:04]

[00:18:05] They don’t, they don’t want to write things down. They hate filling out my forms. If I have them fill out forms in between sessions, you know, and that’s fine.

[00:18:11] I’m like, we don’t have to do that. Let’s do audio. So like record, right? Most everyone’s phone, you can do a voice recording for yourself and like audio journal or video journal, like figure out which style works for you, but be willing to try it.

[00:18:28] Megan: I don’t know why I’ve never thought of that because I’ve like tried so many times to develop like a handwritten journaling practice, you know, and I, there are definitely times where I just feel like I have so much in my head that I do sit down and I’m able to, you know, journal it out.

[00:18:46] But I, yeah, I really liked the idea. If that’s just not where you’re at, then find where you are and, you know, meet yourself there. Or like do the thing that feels easiest and best and is like the path of least resistance. I am personally all about the path of least resistance.

[00:19:05] Carrie: Hundred percent. It’s like, I was just going to see that. And I’m like, that’s so if you follow Abraham Hicks, it’s like always path of least resistance. And that’s what I tell clients. Like we don’t have to do the thing that feels massively uncomfortable in steri right now. Let’s start with what feels easy and okay.

[00:19:24] Megan: Yeah. okay.

[00:19:26] So that sort of brings up another topic under this, which is the specific fear of visibility or being seen online. Can we talk a little bit about this and like, if you have this fear of, you know, just putting yourself out there, putting your product out there for whatever reason, because you don’t want, Susan to see you and make fun of you or, because you’re afraid, that you’ll just be rejected in whatever form, whatever the reason is.

[00:19:57] If you’re like dealing with the fear of putting yourself out. Or being seen online. And so you’re avoiding it. What are some examples of how we can take the path of least resistance to, put ourselves out there and start selling?

[00:20:13] Carrie: So this was by far like my biggest personal fear in the way . Hands down. And I promise like this. I gave you my personal example and then a couple of clients, because everyone’s different and there’s like different ways through this. Um, so for me, this was like the biggest thing, and I was afraid of people who already knew me.

[00:20:34] People from my past, all that kind of stuff. So I didn’t even realize it until I started working with a coach. I was just like, basically making myself wrong so often, because I thought the only way was like, get in front of people who already know me. And it was like, wait a minute, the internet is 7 billion people or whatever.

[00:20:54] Okay. So I say this first of all, to create safety first. I find to be like the essential path. So whatever that looks like.

[00:21:03] For me that looked like finding entrepreneurial groups, online Facebook groups that were private groups that I didn’t necessarily have those people from my past a part of it. Wasn’t.

[00:21:18] I mean, I have a very public Instagram now. But at the time that was way too much. I could not do that. And so I just finally gave myself permission for that to be okay. And once I really embodied this with also the belief that people were rooting for me and people wanted to see my success, which like I did a whole podcast on this, because this literally was the thought that changed everything for me.

[00:21:46] Then I was able to bust through that and now I share very openly. I still have moments and things, of course that come up, but it’s finding that place for yourself. Like we were just talking about with least resistance. And so what I’ll also say is like, I have both variety of clients right now. Like some who the thought of going and sharing with strangers on the internet is like shutdown.

[00:22:10] Terrifying. No, I don’t want to do that. And I’m like, cool. Then let’s talk to. Let’s do the pack of the people, you know, cause that’s least

[00:22:17] resistant. I have

[00:22:19] others that are more like me in my past. Right. That are like happy to go talk to strangers on the internet. But the thought of people from their past is like, no, no, no.

[00:22:29] So it’s just sorting out, like which one? And then letting that be okay.

[00:22:34] Megan: yeah, that’s so funny. I always find it to be so comforting when other people feel that way, because that has been such a huge thing for me, you know, of, just not wanting to be seen by people that I know.

[00:22:48] I see people when I, follow people on Tik TOK, their bio will say, if you know me in person, no you don’t or something. And so it’s, it’s so it’s so comforting to know that you’re not the only person, if you’re out there and you feel this way, you’re not the only one.

[00:23:05] And it’s comforting to know that. You were able to get three of them. And I love the belief that you said you embodied of people are rooting for your success.

[00:23:14] Carrie: Yeah. And you know, the funny thing and not funny because this stuff works. I was a skeptic, a hundred percent skeptic, but the internal always leads to the external and. A whole podcast episode on this, but I shared that on Facebook because I’ve done so much reworking on my internal narratives and this belief.

[00:23:34] And then I remember the day very specifically where I shared this on Facebook, on just like my private page of something. Like, people are rooting for me, you know, however I said it and the number of people from my past that commented and were like, Carrie, we’re always rooting for you.

[00:23:52] And it was like this instant evidence.

[00:23:55] However, I know 1000000%. If I had not done that internal work, I would not have gotten that external validation because if we seek the external first, it just doesn’t work.

[00:24:08] Megan: What’s been helpful for you and what’s helpful for your clients and kind of like bridging the gap between, the thoughts that you have now, once you become aware of those and where you ultimately want to get to, like with me, feeling. Um, this marketing is awkward and weird and icky too.

[00:24:28] Oh, this is in the highest service of people because I have something to offer that can help them. How do you get from.

[00:24:36] one to the other

[00:24:37] Carrie: Yeah. So I think a lot in terms of like bridge thoughts or bridge statements, or however you want to think about it, like if your brain is totally rejecting, the idea of selling is of the highest service and there’s like no part of you that’s bought into that. The math parts, probably. You’re not going to help you, even if you repeat it a hundred times a day, cause we have to have some level of buy-in to that.

[00:25:00] Right. Um, so I find what’s really helpful is gathering evidence, um, not against yourself. In favor of the thing that you’re working toward. Right? And so the truth is, especially when it comes to coaching is all you really need is to have had a result to yourself. Like you’ve helped yourself get a result, or you have helped someone.

[00:25:25] Like we discount ourselves so quickly, but if you have helped someone to get a result, you can help someone else. Like you have evidence, you have proof and it’s really reworking your brain over and over again, to focus on that, because think about it. When nine people tell you something amazing about yourself, and one person has something terrible to say all of our human brains fixated on the one every time.

[00:25:53] But it’s retraining our brain. And I, like, I know this stuff is, um, sometimes like, so woo sounding, but it’s literally science, like it is science now. And so we have the capability to, to rewire our brain and the neurons in our brain. And so when this situation I would really focus on like, what is the result that I helped this client with?

[00:26:20] Or that I helped myself if I don’t have any clients yet. And start to tell that story, like, start to focus on that versus the a hundred things that could go wrong or the hundred things that you’re afraid of. Like, that is just not helpful.

[00:26:36] Megan: Yeah. I like that. Looking for evidence because you’re right.

[00:26:39] If you’ve done it once, then it is repeatable. I think oftentimes like it’s so easy to be like, oh, well that was just a fluke or, you know, we make excuses for our success. but Yeah.

[00:26:51] you’re right. If you’ve done it once you can do it again and find the evidence.

[00:26:56] Okay, so we have 10 minutes left. Do you mind if we get into our slow round questions? Okay, cool.

[00:27:05] Actually before I even ask a normal slow round question, I didn’t ask you this a second ago.

[00:27:10] And I meant to, you mentioned, that you feel like a lot of overcoming this fear that we have in business is unlearning things that we have learned through conditioning society school, or whatever. Can you talk about some of the things that you’ve had to unlearn in your business or some of the most common things that you feel like we need to unlearn in order to, be entrepreneurs?

[00:27:43] Carrie: Yeah. I mean half a million. Um, but honestly, like the main,

[00:27:50] the

[00:27:50] main things that come up for me are I had to really unlearn the belief that things were hard. I am like hard wired for struggle and overcoming. And like, I will out work you and badge of honor, and like all the. That’s been a big one for me. Um, allowing things to be easy and work less and flowy and fun, like that has been a total transformation.

[00:28:18] Um, and a lot of internal work around. That, um, also just this like silly thing, but I shared this with my masterclass this morning. Cause I think this is very common. The more clients I work with, I thought there was like the magical client land. Like somewhere they all hang out

[00:28:38] and I’m not invited. And I don’t know the secret class code and like, where are they?

[00:28:44] Right. Like they must all know the secret. No clients are everywhere, like literally everywhere. So those were like two big ones that have come up for me.

[00:28:55] Megan: I definitely felt this way when I started doing financial coaching. And then I also realized that clients were everywhere. When I met someone randomly at an event in person, I was like, decided that I wasn’t gonna work with anyone.

[00:29:09] Or I wasn’t going to try to work with anyone locally. Like I wanted to have an online business. Um, but I got like two clients early on in my financial coaching business because I just met them in person at different, you know, random events and small talk. And I told them what I did and there were clients, so that’s so true.

[00:29:28] Clients are everywhere.

[00:29:30] Carrie: Yes.

[00:29:31] Megan: So.

[00:29:32] Carrie: I mean, everyone needs to hear that at various stages of your business, but they are literally everywhere.

[00:29:37]

Slow-Round Questions

[00:29:38] Megan: Okay, so, so around question in the last five years, this kind of goes off what you just said. But we can choose something different. Um, in the last five years, what new belief, behavior or habit has most improved your life and or business?

[00:29:55] Carrie: If I had to pick one, it would be retraining my mind. First thing in the morning.

[00:30:01] Like, I, I am such a morning fan enthusiastic. Um, no, you don’t have to wake up at 5:00 AM and like green drink, green juice or whatever you can do, whatever feels best for you. But retraining my mind with, I had some mentors years ago that like really invited us and challenged us to adopt a mantra that you like train your brain to think first thing in the morning.

[00:30:23] And this has been a game changer for me. My thought it can be so simple. So my thought for many years was just today is going to be the best day of my life.

[00:30:34] And I would think that every single day, intentionally, even if it didn’t feel true, I would think. Because if I don’t train my brain every single day, like I lean so, so negative.

[00:30:48] Now everyone meets me and doesn’t believe mad because they’re like, wait, what? But I’m like, I have worked so hard to become this person. So that would be probably the thing I would say that then like bleeds into everything. But some type of intentional thought work, first thing in the world.

[00:31:07] Megan: What are some bad recommendations that you hear in your business area of expertise? Like when it comes to mindset or coaching, what are some, just bad pieces of advice that. you see floating around out there?

[00:31:24] Carrie: Charge your Hate that one Your worth is not up for sale.

[00:31:28] I work with way too many clients where then we have to untangle all of this because they’re so wrapped up in. So like clench fit this around, charging their worth. And I’m like, how do you put a price tag on. What it’s $200 an hour. It’s $2,000 an hour.

[00:31:44] It’s know your service is what you are charging for. And I know that’s so subtle, but honestly it runs really deep. And so that’s like a big one for me. And with that is another thing of like, you can be the best service provider in the world, but if you don’t learn how to be the CEO of your business, you’re going to struggle big time, big time, big time.

[00:32:09] And so that’s why I’m also really passionate about this and like helping, because I want you to get paid well, not just be able to provide a service, you have to be able to do both and. A lot of people just don’t know how to do this. And that’s okay. Have so much grace with yourself again.

[00:32:27] You’ve probably never done it before and that’s okay. But those are some really big ones for me. Mainly because I see where it keeps people stuck.

[00:32:38] Megan: How has a failure or apparent failure set you up for later success in your business? And do you have any favorite failures?

[00:32:47] Carrie: So I think the lens as cliche as it is that I see everything through not always in the moment, but after is like, okay, it’s all lesson. And feedback, right? Like if I can reframe that for myself, for my clients, then we don’t take ourselves out. And the goal is to always get back up faster.

[00:33:07] Right. Like as long as we keep going and we learn from the things, then they don’t have to take us out. So that’s the mindset I like to take around it.

[00:33:16] I think in light of just what we said before, I really want to normalize expansion and contraction.

[00:33:22] I don’t think I knew a ton about this in terms of like how we operate and then how normal this is. So like, when I hit my first 10 K month, I had this massive like expansion. And then it was like, Ooh, I made $4,000 the next month. And I contracted. And then I made myself so wrong for that and had so much just like negative self-talk around that.

[00:33:46] And now I think also, cause I’m like more open to it and I help more clients around it, but it’s like, oh, this is.

[00:33:52] That was a huge lesson in all the things that I would not like to do again, it was like beating myself up and shaming myself and feeling really bad about myself.

[00:34:04] Megan: Thank you so much for being here and. Just having this conversation. I feel like there’s going to be so much that our listeners get out of this. Real quick. Where can people find out more about you and get into your world?

[00:34:17] Carrie: Thank you so much again, this is awesome. I am mostly on Instagram at set yourself free dot LLC. I am also on Facebook. I have a Facebook community. It’s the set yourself free community. I do lots of free trainings and content in there. And then now I’m actually on Tik talk as well. Just getting started at set yourself free dot LLC as well.

[00:34:42] Megan: awesome. I love to talk. I feel like everybody should be on TikTok.

[00:34:48] Carrie: It’s the new organic reach.

[00:34:50] Megan: It is. Absolutely. Yeah. And if for no other reason, even if not for your business, it’s great for self-soothing.

[00:34:58] Carrie: Yeah.

[00:34:59] Megan: Not to say that that’s always the healthiest option, but, uh, uh, anyway. Okay. Awesome. Well, thank you so much, Carrie.

[00:35:07] This was great.

[00:35:08] Carrie: Thank you, Megan.

[00:35:10]

Key Takeaways

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